The thing about raising kids on a farm, even a small one like ours, is that they are always bound to say something creepy in the middle of a conversation. I suppose I just don’t notice it as much from my own daughter when it is just the two of us at home, but now that I am really reflecting on the issue, she says some weird things.
We have butchered livestock in the past and Cami is quite familiar with the process because of her own curiosity. Our animals have died. Our animals have been eaten by wild animals. We have trapped gophers and murdered them to save our prized cabbages. Farms are honest places, really. There is very little you can hide from children and perhaps you wouldn’t even want to.
But farm kids are creepy. Case and point:
Today Cami and I went to the (somewhat) local library for story-time. This was our first time attending and everything we expected was provided; a few songs, a story read aloud, and a craft. Cami is usually quite outgoing, but when surrounded with other children, she tends to freeze up. I call it “only child syndrome”. She didn’t move a muscle during the children’s songs, but as soon as that book came out, she sprinted for the rug to have a listen.
The book was the classic, Spilled Milk. You know the one. It has white silhouettes on a dark blue background that make up various shapes like ice cream or a pig. The woman reading the book aloud was encouraging the kids to guess what they thought the shape was. Mistake number one. After a few real obvious pictures, she came upon a candle or something. It’s pretty bad when I couldn’t even tell what it was.
“What is this one?” the librarian asked.
Kids chimed in with, “Ice cream!” or “A birthday cake!”
What did Cami yell? “It’s blood dripping.” That’s my girl. Let’s spread that morbid sense of humor around to the other children.
Next was an owl shape. “Can anyone guess what this animal is?” The librarian didn’t realize who was in the crowd, even after the last gory guess.
Again, the other kids had reasonable answers like, “A hawk!” or “It’s a bat.”
Silly children. Obviously Cami had the right response, “A vulture! Vultures eat dead, rotten meat! Dead. Rotten. Meat!”
And that folks is why we spent the craft time at our own table. I guess the other story-time moms just couldn’t handle our cool farm attitude towards blood and rotting things. We know how to eviserate an animal, handle baby rabbits, and throw out incredibly creative answers at story-time that isolate ourselves.
It probably doesn’t help that Cami’s mom is also a little odd. This won’t be the last time, I’m sure. Poor kid will just have to hang out with other creepy farm kids.