Dear Microwave,

I’m sorry we haven’t been using you for anything more than hotdogs and cold coffee lately. But the truth is, we don’t need you. It’s not you… it’s us. We have been eating more “real food” lately. We haven’t eaten a t.v. dinner in over three years and –frankly– we can easily use the cooktop for heating hotdogs, coffee, and making popcorn.

Plus, you are pretty old and bulky. You are taking up prime countertop real estate! In this “one-butt-kitchen”, we need every square inch of space there is. Being that we are eating and drinking more real foods, I kind of need the space for my ferments. I am feeling kind though and have decided that you can retire in storage under the house. It’s dusty as hell down there, but I’m sure you will be fine.

Sorry,
Sarah

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10 thoughts on “Dear Microwave,

  1. Good for you!!!!! I did that once and my hubby complain so much that his mother bought another one for Christmas. I’m always praying that it would stop working
    so I can claim that space too! It all about speed to him. I say it about making us glowing in the dark with all that miro-wave that is bad for us!!!!! Mare

  2. Lol poor ole microwAve! On the serious side read a study that children who eat more than 12 hotdogs a month are higher risk for leukemia!!!! My kids can kill a pack in one sitting! Ditch the dogs too! I want to attempt making my own! (Maybe)

    • Eww! A few months ago I scoured the grocery store for some decent hotdogs, but couldn’t find anything without fillers, nitrates, and “fructose” or corn syrup.

      So now I order hot dogs through my co-op that are organic, all grass-fed beef, with no fillers, no sugar/fructose/corn syrup/blahblahblah. They are much more expensive than the 99¢ crap-dogs, but it’s worth it. They taste so good and are so filling!!!

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